my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Randomize
