Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Randomize
