You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize
