oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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