so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
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