Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize
