He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
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