Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
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