Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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