Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
