I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
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