needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
party gras won. party gras always wins.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
