seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
