Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
