Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
