My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Randomize