Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Randomize
