I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
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M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
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All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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