it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize