yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
Randomize
