4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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