ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
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