dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
