I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
this hospital has no fireball
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
