THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
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