I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
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