She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
That was an excessively violent trivia night
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
The adults are the big ones right?
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
