only if we run a train.
done.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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