your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
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