No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
