i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
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