he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize