at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize
