just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Keanu Reeves Photobombed A Couple’s Wedding Photos As A Perfect Gift
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
29 Married People Share What They Used To Find Cute About Their SO—But Now Find Infuriating
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Randomize
