I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Randomize
