i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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