I'm pants shitting drunk right now
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
