i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
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