Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
