I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
tell me about the fingering
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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