whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Randomize
