cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
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