Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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