So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
