he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
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