last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
