So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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