Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Randomize
