Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
