Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
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