check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
